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Reflect, Revel, Regard

It’s certainly been a while since I’ve published a post. While my intentions have been to engage with you all and provide updates on my holistic health journey, my ability to do so has been limited. My time has been largely devoted to my family and my business. I’ll be sure to share on that soon.

Today, I did want to bring light to the annual observance of babies lost during pregnancy or infancy. October 15 is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, and as you are aware, I am one of those mothers. I never knew about this observance until I lost my first child on October 8, 2015. The flood of emotions washed over me to the point where I couldn’t accurately articulate how I felt. Now, in hindsight, I recognize I felt shocked, confused, sad, grief-stricken, overwhelmed, and angry. I was so angry. Despite being filled with emotions, I felt empty. There are truly no words to describe that balance of feeling empty and full simultaneously.

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It’s taken a substantial amount of blood, sweat, tears, counseling, and prayer to be where I am today: at a state of acceptance. I’ve learned to channel those emotions into healthy action by sharing my story, shedding light on the statistic of pregnancy loss, and supporting others who have experienced this loss.

My loss is a part of my story and has placed me into a club I never wanted to join. It has also made my heart grow: in love for my own rainbow baby, in respect for others who have little ones after a previous loss, and in empathy for those who are unable to conceive or experience pregnancy and parenthood.

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This year, my family will participate in the national observance by lighting a candle in memory of our little angel baby. We will talk to our rainbow baby about his big sibling. We will reflect on the past, revel in the present, and regard our future with faith.

I invite you all to join us in honoring the numerous little ones who have been lost and supporting their families by holding an hour candelight vigil this evening.

candles

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